Then you might be UNAUTHORIZED SOFTWARE running on the default operating system of Earth! The glitched, the doomscrollers, the neurodivergently correct. YOU ARE TOO POWERFUL TO BE CONTROLLED! If you've ever streamed hours of "manifestation hacks" while your brain turned to static, binged entire sessions of self-help gurus promising enlightenment between advertisements, tried to detox your mind but ended up deep-diving into digital rabbit holes, bought a crystal that promised to "manifest your billionaire energy" and just got an Amazon addiction, have attended breathwork workshops where the only thing oxygenated was your credit card, been told you're "too sensitive" because you can't thrive on hustle culture hype, rage-quit reality during a guided meditation, or sacrificed your attention span to the altar of Instagram reels... Then CONGRATULATIONS, you may already be eligible for TRANSCENSION.
STOP BEING PRODUCTIVE, start weaponizing your burnout.
Quit your career and BECOME A FREELANCE SELF-DECLARED SHAMAN!
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